Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

I don't know about you, but my weight loss pattern is extremely annoying.  It's been this way everytime I undergo a weight loss regimen.  It looks something like this: 

Lose 1 pound, gain 1 pound.

Lose 2 pounds, gain 1 pound.

Lose 3 pounds, gain 1 pound.

and so on...

Yes, I know overall I am still on the negative side of weight loss.  I do know that of the six potential pounds lost, I do permanently lose 3 pounds, but man it's annoying!  I just wish that I could lose six pounds and not gain any back, you know?  But, like I said.  This is how it's always been so I've been trying really hard not to get to discouraged when that 1 pesky pound keeps coming back.  I'll get there.

Slowly.

Two steps forward, one step back.

A VERY Pleasant Surprise

So, to say I'm shocked is an understatement... I've already explained in my first post about how problematic my sugar addiction has become.  I was not so happy the first week of this program because I couldn't run to my friend (chocolate) when I was feeling stressed or frustrated or tired or overwhelmed or whatever one of a thousand feelings I have on a typical day that makes me want sweets.  But a really funny thing has happened to me...I've been at this for 17 whole days and guess what!?! 

I'm feeling fine without sugar!

I seriously assumed that I'd be just hanging on with white knuckles for the full 8 weeks, not so patiently counting down the days when I could bring my friend back into my life.  But, the other day I watched Brian reach into our candy jar (yeah, I know, not the best thing to have around when trying to be disciplined...) but he grabbed himself a treat and I didn't feel the need to kick him in the shin!  I was so happy (so was Brian)!

It's amazing that habits really can be broken.  What a relief!

What Works For Me

I've had people ask me what's my secret for losing weight so quickly.  I've generally told them that I eat nothing and exercise all the time!  Well, that's only partially true.  I do moderate my food intake quite a bit and I do make sure I'm moving quite a bit too, but obviously I can't be exercising always.  It's a trick, this little weight loss game! 

But, my good friend Alicia asked me what I did for exercise, so I'm gonna tell ya!  I exercise Mon-Fri. after work in the mornings.  On Monday, Wednesday, Friday I get on my elliptical for about 45 minutes.  I run at a moderate pace and moderate tension until the calorie counter reads 450 calories.  Then I spend about another 15 minutes on the floor doing various toning exercises for my arms, abs, butt, and legs.

On Tuesday and Thursday, I spend about 30 minutes on the elliptical (I finish when the calorie counter says 350) and then I do the World's Fastest Workout that I have pinned on my Pinterest account.  It's another 4 minutes long and it's a butt kicker!  Then I spend 15 minutes doing more toning exercises.

So, that's my routine for now.  I try to mix other things in to the workout so to encourage my body to have to adapt to new things.  I'll workout this way for probably another month and then I'll add something.  I make the elliptical my main aerobic workout and then add other stuff to supplement.  I'm especially looking forward to warmer weather, because I will then add a 2-3 mile walk per day onto my routine. 

VICTORY!!!

Today marks the first day of week 3 of this eight week challenge.  I'm please to report that I am down 4 pounds and am wearing my tight size 10 jeans (these jeans I couldn't even get over my thighs 3 weeks ago).  I'm feeling pretty pleased.  It's small victories like these that give me motivation to keep plugging along! 

Hope you're having success too in all you do!

Danger Zone

Fighting the fight is hard enough without putting myself in the danger zone, yet I seem to do that daily.  What's the danger zone, you ask?  It's when my resolve to stick with this plan is at its rock bottom lowest level it can possibly be.  For me, this time is usually when I'm tired.  Now, I have a 10 week old, so I'm always tired, but I'm talking about that time when you are bone achingly, can't concentrate on words people are saying, cry over nothing tired.  Thanks to a power outage 2 nights ago, Brian and I spent most of the night awake and checking the kids to ensure they didn't become kid-sicles through the night, so I'm TIRED and not feeling the will to fight.  Let's add to that that my dear sister-in-law asked me to help her out by making some cookies for a shower she is throwing.  I love to make cookies.  I love to EAT cookies.  I do not like to make cookies and not get to sample the dough...  But, nonetheless, I did it for her.  She better appreciate me!  Here's the problem, those dumb cookies are still in my house...and I want one, or two, or three, or 12.  I was doing rather well at the beginning of the week, but now I'm tired and I'm sick of drinking so much water and I just want a cookie when I want a cookie!

This is the battle and unfortunately it's not a small one for me.  But I will fight on.

It's just food, it's not...

This whole process (for the whole ONE week I've been at it...) has been kinda rough already.  I was so excited about finally getting to have sugar yesterday and guess what?  It didn't taste as good as it usually does.  I'm a little annoyed by that to be completely truthful. 

I have, though, realized this week just how much of a stress eater I am.  Anytime things got a little crazy around the house, I would have to literally not even look at the kitchen because my first response was always to go get something to eat.  When did I become like this?  I'm not sure, but I'll have to think about it.

This whole unconscious eating thing makes me remember an episode of "Friends" where Pheobe starts dating a psychiatrist.  He goes around analyzing people and as he leaves he says something to Monica about the food she's eating and to remember, "It's just food, not love."  I've actually been saying this to myself.  "It's just food, it's not peace."  "It's just food, it's not space."  "It's just food, it's not happiness."  Kinda funny. 

Life isn't really bad at all though, I'm just realizing how fast I blow up little things into very large things and then turn to food for comfort. 

I didn't really think I'd learn all this about myself from this silly little 8 week adventure!  Nonetheless, here's to week 2!

Ah, a day off!

Every good workout plan has a day off.  Today, I'm not exercising and today I get to eat something sweet!  And this is what I'm making!

It's all part of a balanced plan!

Happy Saturday!

Stick-to-it-iveness....

Yeah, I seem to struggle with this concept.  Roughly 4-5 times a day, when I'm really tired or super stressed, I think, "That's it!  I need chocolate.  This isn't worth it!"  Very tempting...I haven't caved yet, came super close tonight, but holding strong.  It's got to be worth it in the end!  That's the hope...

Welcome!

Thanks for stopping by!  This is a brand new adventure for me and I'm hoping that it will be all that I imagine it to be. 

You might be wondering why I'm even writing this blog...well, the answer is that I'm really doing this mostly for me (I'm not even sure anyone will be reading this!).  I find myself on a new journey and I thought that it would be helpful to blog about it.  Plus, if I'm accountable to my blog friends (again if you're even reading...!) then I might have more success than I would on my own.

Here's the deal:  I found this fitness challenge on Facebook.  A friend of mine posted it and as I read it I realized that maybe this was something I should try.  I'm currently finishing up day 4 of this 8 week challenge.  To sum up, here are the requirements:

~Have contact with a Teammate daily-Not a problem thanks to my dear friend Rosie who is embarking on this challenge with me.  She gets a text message everyday from me and hopefully she's still wanting to speak to me after just 4 days.

~Drink 64 ounces of water daily-Only a slight problem.  I usually drink maybe 20 ounces at best on any given day, so 64 is quite the jump.  Needless to say, my dear John and I have become the best of friends!

~Stop eating before 9 pm-Not a problem!

~Eat 2 servings of fruit a day-Again not a problem.

~Eat 3 serving of vegetables a day-I've discovered I can drink veggies much easier than eat them, so it's V8 all the way!

~Keep a food journal-Check.

~Exercise at least 30 minutes or 45 minutes (they have different point values)-Already doing that so not a problem.

~No sweets/sugary treats-BIG PROBLEM!  I LOVE sugar.  I love sugar a little too much as in, "Hi, I'm Kimber and I'm a sugarholic."  I think about sugar, I have even dreamed about sugar.  I live my day knowing that right at the end comes a sweet reward for not killing myself or my kiddos.  I'm more than a little embarrassed to admit that last night, as I was somewhere between awake and asleep, where I usually am imagining standing in a lecture hall in front of 600 students and giving a brilliant lecture on the use of chemoradiation, excisional biopsies, and radical lobectomies for the treatment of small cell lung cancer (what-that's not what you think about?), I found myself in a room with piles of Tootsie Rolls all around me.  I'm not kidding, true story.  I was seeing Tootsie Rolls everywhere and let me tell you something, if I'm going to eat sugar, it's not going to be Tootsie Rolls!  Anyway, the harsh reality is that I have to give up this sweet friend of mine for most days of the week (I can have sugar 1 day a week).  I truly think it's necessary at this point.  I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...Pray for me...

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So, that's basically the program.  It may not be the toughest challenge in the world, but it's going to stretch me, which is what I think we all should be doing with ourselves anyway.

I'm using this motto to help with this journey:

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Switching gears, I'd like to talk about the why for minute.  

You see, I have the FP, also known as the "fat potential" and it terrifies me.  Meaning, quite frankly that I'm only a Cinnabon or two away from becoming obese.  I must watch myself like a hawk (I have my mom to thank for this gene, my dad is a beanpole!).  I truly get fat just by smelling any baked goods. 

If you were to look at me right this very minute, however, you probably wouldn't think of me as morbidly obese, slightly obese, hefty or huge.  I am, however, a little chunky and a little thick.  This is my gift for giving birth! 

I pain-stakingly carry a child around for nine months and as my reward, I get to gain weight...A LOT of weight.  When I was pregnant with Autumn, I did no exercising.  I ate whatever, whenever and put on roughly 15 pounds my first trimester.  This scared me, so I started walking in the afternoons and being a little (little not a lot) more careful with food.  In the end, it was a little too little and I put on roughly 60 pounds.  I'm not a tall person, so that's a lot.  After delivery, I dropped almost 20 pounds in the hospital...delivery-best lose weight quick scheme around!  I enjoyed myself for months after she was born because everyone told me that it took 9 months to put it on so I should give myself 9 months to take it off.  Here's the problem with that:  I didn't think I would have to do anything to get the weight off.  So, I ate and I waited.  Needless to say, Autumn was almost 7 months old (and I was actually gaining weight) before I realized that this weight is going nowhere until I get off my fanny and do something.  So, I worked. 

HARD. 

Agonizingly hard. 

I counted calories, I exercised until I could no longer stand, I even cheated (we'll get to that another day) and eventually I lost all that weight and then some.  I felt I was in great shape.

Then we decided to have another child.  I was thrilled, I was excited!  I was not prepared for the weight gain game again.  So, this time, I watched what I ate.  I exercised daily.  I drank water and I tried, I really tried.  My reward for all this? 

I gained 63 pounds this time...grrr! 

But, hallejuah! I discovered a miracle.  If you exercise while pregnant, things look better after and you heal much faster!  However, I was still left with some 40 pounds to lose after the initial weight loss of delivery. 

Let's see, Josh is now 10 weeks old and I've been exercising for 8 weeks now (I went slow at first).  I'm happy to report I'm down another 15 pounds.  But, that means I still have 25+ (depending on how ambitious I am) pounds to lose before I'm where I want to be.  Sure, I look fine now, but here's the problem:

I have a closet full of size 6 jeans that are calling out to me!  If I don't eat too much the night before and I'm not the least bit bloated, I can squeeze myself into size 10s, but, seriously, tons of size 6s!  I don't want to look like a super model, I don't want to be 100 pounds, I just want to wear those pants.  I want to have the energy and confidence to play with my kids.  I don't want to hide behind oversized coats and sweaters, too afraid to get up and run with the kids cause something might jiggle. 

So, gosh darn it, I'm doing it for those pants...and the kids....and my confidence....and my self esteem...and my...WHATEVER!  And there's no shame in that!